One last time

One last time I just want to talk negative. 

I just want to scream, I want to write all my feelings on this blog. And I want everyone to read it. I want everyone I write about to read it. So they can soak in and know what they are doing to me. But then I am reminded I shouldn't give them the satisfaction of knowing how angry I am. How hurt I am. How bad I just want to throw my hands up in the air, and give up. Give in. And say YOU WIN! You broke me.

Then I remember, they didn't. Because I am NOT giving in. I am not giving up. I am not broken.


LOOK WHAT I GAINED?

 I have gained the most beautiful happiness a girl could ask for!

Now I have a husband.

And he's always worthy to bless me. 

And our home.

He takes me to the temple.

He holds my hand every night in prayer.

He's honest.

And loyal.

And when I feel like I have failed.

When I feel undeserving he makes me feel incredible.

He reminds me of my worth.

So maybe you broke my heart for a minute. Or maybe you cut me out of your life. Or maybe you spread some rumors. Or maybe you choose someone else. Or maybe you left me behind. Maybe you straight forgot about me. 

That's okay!

I haven't forgotten you. Not at all. And I never will.

Now, let me climb down from my soap box. 

And leave all you readers with this...

I am not asking for pity. Or sympathy. Or concern.

This isn't a cry for help. Or a public stab at some vicious enemy I hate.

It's a reminder.

For myself.

That I am strong.

I am blessed.

I am different than I used to be. 

Exactly who I want to be.

Exactly who He would have me be.

I am happy!